Its about making memories worth repressing
its sad that the first thing i assume is that ur trying to indirectly tell me you fucked on a breakfast table
by asking you if you bought one for the apartment?
he pointed at my clit and asked with a confused face, 'whats this thingy??"
they ran out of cups so I just drank out of a cowbell.
You left half a beer on someones car and claimed it was a second day of hanakuh gift
I managed to throw up 90 feet under water, just removed my breathing tube, puked, put it back in. All inclusive is the way to go.
this is the 21st century. you drunk fuck him and then go on a date.
This guy in church just had a prayer request to help him get through his hangover. He is my new hero.
Just put a dog collar on someone's child.....was a great hit with everyone but his mom.......I think she hates me. I'm okay.with that
He rubs his penis on back when he think I'm sleeping
I'm giving great sideboob & it's being wasted on my parents.
And then she said "welcome homeeeee!!!" As she got off. Best thing about being back from Afghanistan
I was on tinder the whole time I was waiting for my pregnancy test results at the doctors.
If you feel frisky later I have a cowboy hat that would look great on you naked...
Who is this......
Even if they did assume we were doing kinky shit, it's not like they're gonna be like, "HALT SATAN! INTAKE SOME JESUS AND VOMIT YOUR SINS!"
Randomize
