just got cropdusted by the delivery guy...this was not in my job description.
her dad is making me watch Glen Beck, i only agreed because i penetrated his daughter earlier.
I didn't realize how much I missed him until his balls were back in my mouth..
it's not a party till someone uses the fire extinguisher.
Taped crackers to the wall. Sat I'n the dryer. Bobby had to pull me out by my hair. No more.
Beware of calls from Dad. I just had a longer than I would care to admit convo about the ididarod. Apparently it starts tomorrow.
You stole my camera, took a picture of yourself and said "that's beautiful, just as beautiful as our waitress".
just watched a cripple ollie in his wheelchair to get on to the elevated floor in the bar. I. LOVE. WISCONSIN
You're obviously not trying hard enough. GET LAID. Kittens die for less.
Touche salesman.
Thanks for the viagra you gave me last night. I ended up getting called in to work to cover a shift. So I had to tell Kayla that I couldn't hang out and I had to try and hide my dick all night while walking serving people food all night.
I FOUND AN AUSTRALIAN THEY CALL VOMMING 'RAINBOW SNEEZING' I'M NEVER LETTING HIM LEAVE EVER
Stay away a while longer.
Still not sure if they're cops or strippers.
She fucked the dishwasher AND the manager.
Well, she isn't a classist. You've got to give her that.
You challenged a dog groomer that she couldn't cut human hair ... How's the shaved head
he asked me why I let you steal the gnome, and you jumped out of the bathroom, yelled "you know why!" and ran outside with said gnome
Randomize
