She tried to have sex with him but he quote unquote respected her
Just shaved my vagina. It's been so long I forgot what it looked like. You need to come over right now.
My dad just questioned my drinking habits... Clearly he doesn't know what kind of college education he's paying for
Just had a pleasant conversation with a mugger while he was taking off my shoes. Why can't I get along with people like this sober?
some crying dude holding an empty fifth of burnetts just showed up at our door and asked 'do i live here?'
Hey your work video crashed my computer. The 8 pornos running in the other window didn't. Congratulations.
We're so stoned that were both cuddling on the couch and crying over Forest Gump while eating popcorn. She asked me if I'd fuck away the sadness. I think she's serious.
I feel like that's something that he should've asked me over dinner..... instead of with his hand down my pants? maybe not
I woke up wearing my panties and an eyelash, soo I'd say your birthday was a success.
You are under a naked attack watch for the whole weekend. Shelter in place.
well considering the guy who just delivered my cookies had to console me as i had a mental breakdown in front of him i'd say i'm 4/10 right now, thank you
Hella random but just hear me out...A bar that is a petting zoo. Bitches love petting zoos.
WTF I can't even get a boyfriend here and you're getting nudes from across the country
I did something very bad. More specifically, my boss.
I am at a cat party and I just witnessed people lapping vodka out of a bowl for a contest. Lol
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