is it normal that we went to that class once and both got 100's on the final? ohhhh, arizona state.
Hey cutie is the game almost over? I'm making dinner for us it'll be ready soon. Xox
You would rather make fucking dinner than watch a hockey game that rivals the epic-ness of miracle, the one of the biggest upsets in sport history? Babe I don't know if I can date a girl with such terrible priorities.
She compared sex to doing dishes."You scrub them until they're wet."
A shower wasnt enough to wash off the shame but at least it took care off the blood.
I smell like fire and strippers. Successful sunday funday.
I consented to having my finger branded. How was your night?
not a day goes by that I don't wish you were here or I there. Today it was because I had the desire to get high and go look at the jellyfish at the aquarium and you're the perfect buddy for that.
I lost my bra at his grandma's house so there's that.
He brought me Plan B in the snowstorm.
A+ 👏🏼
Dude I asked him to get me beef jerky at 4 am and he actually walked to CVS to get it. CVS closes at 12 but it was the perfect opp to dip out
He got punched in the face last night? By who? I’ll invite him to our formal. Seriously.
Can you get winded from lip syncing? I don't know how Britney does it
the guy had "bad bitches only" tattooed above his penis...
It probably doesn't matter because I'm drunk...but I'm sorry for getting you drunk, having you almost lose your place to live, all your friends, permanently lose your liver functions, throwing up on my floor, losing virginity...etc...mostly I'm sorry for making you watch: cabin in the woods.
This date is awful. He’s too boring to bang
Is porn accurate? Can I order a pizza and do the delivery boy?
Randomize
