i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
The more I sober up, the more sick I am/realize how weird dancing around a wine bottle was
brass monkey on radio. cant stop dancing.
i just woke up naked on my porch, holding the neighbors cat in my arms.
i'm sure the inside of her vag looks like Normandy circa 1944
and yes i had to double check that date for that joke to be accurate
I will never understand why the dress to get laid party is always scheduled to be during family weekend. Its not even ironically funny.
You know when you get a stripper pays your bail. You got good wood.
Is it weird that i want a guy to ask me to homecoming by spelling it out in meatballs?
THATS VERY WEIRD
Yeah. I'm so over work, that I'm not even satisfied pretending to work anymore. I just flat out want to go home. Fuck this job
I'm in Home Depot and I can feel the straight bob the builders staring at me. I bet it's like I have a rainbow arrow pointing at me.
You drunk? Cause I have a terrible idea...
After you punched me you ran away and it took an hour to find you... On the wrong floor... Sitting alone saying "it doesnt make sense"
Good for you, kid with a beer in hand as you walk to your 11 am class.
I thought this was a dry campus.
That means you have to bring your own beer from home.
Oh god I just had an orgasim riding my bike. I need to get laid pronto.
Randomize
