I've decided to only have meaningless sex from now on.
And what brought this epiphany?
I've decided it's a lot easier to have dirty amazing sex with someone when you don't care about the other person or what they think of you. I'm going to test this theory soon. Will update you later
she fell down the flight of stairs and was fine until she saw the two broken beer bottles on the ground by her.
thats a woman
If my nicknames are based on what I throw up, you can call me Jimmy Johns
she told me that she was curious about how cum tasted. of course i left you.
who knew that a girl that let me piss on her within 20 minutes of meeting her would get upset i couldn't remember her name.
I positioned my bed perfectly so around 10 a.m. every morning there are rays of sunshine coming through the window in my room. Now i can tan while PTFO.
Need to stop getting stoned with this chick, I keep waking up covered in pizza sauce
I am actually insulted by the long string of ugly, fat girls he hooked up with after me.
We will have to go big on the 4th! Nothing says independence like the impending doom of an ankle monitor
I feel like someone kicked me repeatedly in the ribs. I don't think sex is supposed to do that.
I just pulled a piece of cookie out of my bra in the middle of class. I'm forever alone.
So last night I taught an old homeless dude to respond to "Blue" so I could shout your my boy Blue at the party
FUCK and YOU. times 10. To infinity and beyond. You bastard. Worst. Cockblock. Ever. I'm going to nail your sister.
We drank vodka and koolaid through a traffic cone. It got rowdy.
This whole thing is fucking bullshit. I should be wasting all my hard-earned money at Planet Con this weekend but NOOOOOOOOO. Now I'll never get Roy Thomas to sign my comic
Randomize
