Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
Nothing better then your mother meeting someone you randomly had sex with and him introducing himself as the guy who rocked her world once.
I'm in a trailer park. But I'm not scared. The virgin always lives.
We had sex in the woods. It was great until some bird started mimicking my orgasm sounds
New York to be Host to America’s Biggest Singles Event
you were crying while pretty ricky was playing, what did you want me to do
there are 10 yearolds here who keep calling me on the elbow rule!
Wait are they playing beer pong to?
You can't say "they have anal bleaching for that" and then just hang up
Also: how drunk is your brother? He just left me a message as batman.
I imagine I kinda look like a banana with one boob out.
Kylie Jenner Wasn’t in the Kardashian X-Mas Cards & the Internet is Losing it
Hay for your next interview you should go in with fake blood on your cloths and tell them you just finished saving a life, then cry
I'm sorry for drunkenly throwing a spoon at you and then laughing at your pain.
I was gonna respond but i couldnt figure out a way to rearrange 'fuck his brains out' to sound grammatically correct
It's all part of my master plan: have him buy me all I can eat pizza and all I can drink beer AND THEN tell him there was no spark and we're better off as friends.
All I want for my birthday to be fingered and eat pizza
I was the only one in group sessions to bring up sex as a stress reliever. Some of those people were awfully judgy despite the fact we were all in a psych ward.