He saved me in his phone as Easy Jen. Should I be offended?
I wouldn't worry about it. He has me as "Sex Puppet."
just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
No. You are not the Kate in this relationship. I will do what I want.
That shot tasted like Sant Claus came in my mouth. I love the holidays.
He said he wanted to have kids with me so they could grow up to be professional linebackers. Not. A. Complient.
GOOD NIGHT DREAM OF ALCOHOL SNO CONES
DUDE EDDIE MURPHY JUST DID A BODY SHOT OFF A HOOKER. IM NEVER COMING HOME
Pretty sure encouraging you to sleep with 2 different girls while keeping you in the good graces of both has lost me the ability to call myself a woman. But that's just the kind of friend I am; dedicated.
The only difference is Iv never super glued straws to your nipples.
i know. like I have the nerve to talk about poverty. I eat peanut butter out of the jar.
Confirm that you received these messages so that I know you feel the agony of my vagina. There is such a thing as "too many penises".
my biography would be titled "haunting truths and dick jokes: a tale of love, loss, and masturbation."
yeah I woke up in jail with two different shoes on and neither of them were mine
I just my had my first cup of coffee in a week. I think I might orgasm.
I'm too pretty to be this sexually frustrated.
Randomize
