i seriously hope you fucking die....you are the worst.
SHit! Sorry, sent to wrong person
new revelation: five guys for breakfast
new revelation: previous revelation not a good revelation
dude. FULL moustache. it was like getting head from Tom Selleck
Found my new morning breakfast spot. Hospital cafeteria. Nobody asks questions, they just assume shit went downnn
the new roommate knocked on my door this morning holding a bong in one hand and my dennys leftovers from last night in the other. love this kid. Best student housing placement ever.
grown man stumbling drunk down green street wearing nothing but a hot dog costume and crying. its not even noon yet.
Don't worry we found her. Somehow she ended up on my roof with 2 bar stools
He is now the second fuck buddy that i have met by walking up and grinding on him. My ass is so much more productive than dating
Mcdonalds hasn't even finished serving breakfast yet and u two are getting drunk?
On a side note the mornings you do so much Xanax that you wake up totally at one with the universe and feel invincible are great
I feel like I should throw some tampons around my workspace so everyone will know what's really going on
I'm glad I can share my workout progress with you via my nudes
If you sleep with him I will stab you int the uterus with a pitchfork.
Prepare the pitchfork.
I WILL KICK YOU IN THE FUCKING THROAT IF YOU EAT MY FUCKING ICE CREAM.
I'm not fucking you with a Stormtrooper helmet on!
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