That fucking fat Asian kid that NOBODY invited is stuck in the dryer again
What a whore. She reminds me of that asian guy who can eat all the hotdogs.
On the bright side I got 500 American Express points paying for the abortion
You broke a cabinet. You were climbing up it and it collapsed on you. Lines were crossed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Some dude gave me a questioning look as I came out of the women's toilet. I just responded 'blowjob' and he understood, then shook my hand.
no, i remember trying to staple my nipples together. I just can't figure out where the hell stapler came from.
Haga you didnt jbsii whee wu an therer
Party on wayne
She said my new name was "ranch" because I "looked delicious"
Btw, do you want me to fix this with a box of wine and a chick flick or is this more of a 'lets head to the strip club' problem? I'm just trying to analyze the emotional depth of the situation.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is it a coincidence that the reminder on my phone to take my birth control is "I'm ready to party" from Bridesmaids?
Said he wanted to wear me as a loincloth. Not sure if sexual or predatory
These snow days are takeing a toll on my liver
All I remember was my mom walking through the door, and then me asking her if she wanted a hit.
She and I had some intense sexual tension earlier when she dumped a package of apple straws all over my body.
We still on for Manwhore Monday?
Randomize