Hahahhahaha! Oooh get it! Ugh I am so dead but if I go to the lib whuich I will hopefully b havung sex instead, ill hit u up
You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
On blowjobs: "If you decide to go there, you finish the job. No complaining." I don't care if it sounds like she's talking about Iraq, I'm in love.
You were in the corner dancing by yourself yelling "I look good", when really you looked ridiculous and drunk
You're such a slut.
I prefer opportunist.
I just want to go some place where I can have a nice night. Grind on men who speak no English, make out with a girl, and not feel judged.
The party theme was heirs and heiress's. Most guys came in polo shirts but he came as the "arch duke of vagina".
frankly if you're gonna get kicked out of your place, hooking up with your gay roommate's boyfriend would be the most entertaining way to do it.
you dipped you banana in queso last night.
i think i traded my wallet for a tim hortons gift card.
Hey, ok if I kidnap you? I wanna test a theory.
Please tell me you're not home alone watching Glitter.
Can you see in?
Me and you. The most fucked up people on the planet drinking together. Hell yeah
All I remember is allowing my uber driver to pull over on the side of the road to give me a massage. I was alone
Mom just walked in on a bj. IT'S WHATEVER.
Randomize
