So I answered the door in my underwear expecting my boyfriend. Instead I opened the door to Mormon missionaries. Do you think that was a sign from God?
i would have smoked before this dance, how ever i have surgery Monday and I looked up weed and anesthesia and fatalities was mentioned, so i decided that it would be a bad idea
probs a good idea
i like the whole idea of life and being alive
you sure you're not high?
He had a ladies night special at his place. Unlimited jello shots till 10, 50 cents after.
I'm taking her home. She just told a 90 yo woman in a packers hat to "suck her cock".
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The guy I wanted to make out with just got beat up, let's roll.
She may be a slut, but at least she's a dedicated slut. She's always super tan and has her shit shaved in really cool designs.
Tomorrow is Have Sex and Climb A Mountain Day. We have amazing dates.
GO AHEAD, BITCH, GLARE AT MY WAFFLE ONE MORE TIME. I WILL FUCK YOU UP.
Omg. I wanna lecture the drug dealer about how highschool should not be his glory days.
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You might call them booze related cuts, I call it "partying so hard you sweat blood"
my last search of the night was "the physics of green eggs and ham" what the fuck
Because my vagina is Ellis Island. All foreign penises must be presented for inspection and competency. God bless America.
Strip Simon Says: DO IT
STOP SENDING ME NAKED PICTURES WHEN I'M TRYING TO TEACH. MONDAY TUESDAY 1-3 IS A DICK AND ARSE FREE ZONE
well apparently i sat in the bathroom staring in the toliet at my vomit. it was blue. how was your night?
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