so wait, they're fucking, but it doesn't count as cheating cause they only do anal?
i just walked by a road side game of beer pong? it's gonna be a long day
im shaking like a drug addict and i almost just shat my pants when i sneezed...no more patron for me
i'm almost done photoshopping my face on his wife. it's a done deal
23 Parents Gave Awful Advice about “The Birds and the Bees”
And by the way, how is me getting head even remotely comparable to you fucking 3 guys?
just found my diary from when i was 14. i demand a drinking game of this.
FYI : beer farts in the morning chase women right out of bed!
You were yelling at the cops across the street saying they were at the wrong party
Sadness tears and throw up everywhere
These 19 Deaths Are Ironically Hilarious
can we get vodka so I have an excuse for being an emotional wreck
Just had a 10 minute long conversation with my cat about how if I died, and he needed to eat me to live, I'd totally be ok with it. Definitely still drunk.
And I feel like pitchers of margaritas accidentally make it down your throat a lot.
I mean, the lady at the Mexican restaurant insisted. She said she would win a prize if she sold another pitcher before noon. And plus I got to wear a sombrero
I was just laughing and almost crying after I orgasmed, and then almost crying because I was laughing so hard. That's new.
Does he think you're psycho?
We will go to karaoke
Okay, well, i'm covered in paint, haven't showered & have already been drinking, so if I fall on the floor in a blaze of depeche mode & beer tears, you can't pretend you don't know me
I have tasted many bathrooms