But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
I just saw a guy give a mop to his fat wife and say "Look, an exercise stick!"
2am update: i think I'm in Mexico but I found a dennys. Everyone but this cute family of 4 is speaking Spanish. Cute family of 4 is helping me out.
Ok, maybe I don't want to know what happened last night... But somehow I guess I moved the oven.
Why don't you throw your vagina at it and see what happens?
And the cops are back. At least my pants are on this time
Also I'm so used to having sex with river guides that when he pulled out a condom I was actually surprised
You have talents. You got me laid two weekends in a row in two different cities.
I'm pretty sure that's why we have such good sex because we are secretly trying to kill each other
Normally, it will inspire me to work. Today, it's inspiring me to masturbate.
You drunkenly said something along the lines of "move forever" to the lady standing in your way. Needless to say you had too many mimosas at breakfast.
Dude, I woke up with wet dollar bills in my boxers where did you take me???
I got the security footage. Thank you boobies!
To be honest, the last time I saw him he had a jesus costume on telling people to pray to his bible.
So he's at the chuch?
No, hooters.
So I have three weeks to get rid of his girlfriend and fuck him senseless before he goes to jail
Randomize
