the other night i did but this one wasnt and it was so random. i was hooking up with this boy who wanted to roleplay and pretend to be snakes
I just woke up with the words DO IT on my hand and six beers in my purse.
got a scholarship and a hot psych teacher. hello spring 2010
4 months of living in europe has taught me the art of making a drunken stumble look like a dance move
He's just giving off this "someone be a bitch to me" vibe
he told me it was like eating gods vagina.
I will blow you tomorrow if you bring me food tonight. Like a payment plan
You got her pregnant one week before your vasectomy? You couldn't wait one week to cheat on me?
Alive.
So much puke
Well you finally jumped into that tree you've always wanted into and some girl gave you an 8.5. You were very happy.
You remember the guy they called Meat in high school? Well, let's just say my vagina remembers him now.
Almost ran out to the street bowl in hand when I hear the ice cream truck pull up outside.
Everything about that text makes me proud to be your sister.
Basically we had a threesome in one room and a fivesome in the next room. Its what I like to call a win win situation.
I cant believe you bit her ass cheek, she must have been really weirded out.
yeah so we made out to make it less awkward
Fuck twitter. Fuck men. Fuck bras. Fuck flip flops. Fuck makeup. Fuck perfume.
Randomize
