My itunes is telling me i listened to toxic by b spears 108 times last night
all we did was drink wine and talk about how people who dont have facebook dont exist.
im trying to make cookies in the george foreman
I'm sweating while I eat mac and cheese. That fat.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They are chanting tits for freedom and I'm highly considering
It wasn't the stripper that gave you the hickey but I just figured out who did
we can't get the sharpie off the toilet seat from where you pressed your forearm with THUG LIFE written on it while you puked until 3 last night
how is telling me how long you drunkenly fucked someone supposed to make me miss you?
She introduced me as that girl Nathan was fingering
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Will it make you feel better if we wear the title of dysfunctional fucking roommates? It requires monogamy unless we want to bang someone together.
Sexual Frustration City, population: Me.
I just tried to give a picture of a dude a blowjob. through my computer screen. I was leaning forward with my mouth open and everything so WALK AWAY
i had a tequila and emotion induced one night stand with a random stranger. senior year: infinity me: 0.
You came in last night, ate an entire avocado in silence, and then told me I should never accept rides from strangers. Not sure I even want to know what happened to you last night!
Tomorrow has nothing to do with the threesome
I am the one with the vagina. I get to call it.
Naw dude theres seriously a lobster in my sock drawer. Why?
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