Why did we buy the only spinning apartment on campus?
some kid came into the principals office and tried to explain what he was sent there for through interpretive dance.
Dude ur right that IS what a vagina looks like!
Do everybody a favor and GET LAID MORE.
As far as classy things to do in front of your ex go, throwing up on your own shirt is not one of them.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She definitely looked like a troll, but I had take one for the team. Or at least thats what I keep telling myself
She started howling at the moon. That was pretty much the deal breaker.
I'm going to get like 25 drinks at their wedding and just leave them sitting around or give them to hobos.
Now back to adults eating hotdogs.
She asked if I wanted to "Mormon Motorboat" her, which I guess is just motor-boating her through her cloths. Turns out I did.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Strange request but for my birthday you should get me one of those vibrators that you can plug into your iPod that go along with the music.
Shut the fuck up. It's not the end of the world. Now come get your asshole bleached with me or we're not roommates anymore.
Good morning! So would you prefer me to show up kind of late or on time but looking like I got chewed up and spat out by an episode of Buffy the Vampire Slayer?
It was rocky mountain showdown of course we got shitfaced and talked about eating buffaloes
beggars cant be choosers....im desperate and he has a dick. he checks all the boxes.
Waking up naked and dehydrated has become a regular occupancy for me.
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