i need an iv and a liver transplant
As a matter of fact my bong is named Hulkamania brother
i think i am going to devote my summer to making my cats internet celebrities
update. expensive tequila only makes the mistakes more expensive.
Sorry girl, my dick is like a rollercoaster. You only get a picture after you ride
do you think they make 'sorry for walking in on you drunkenly jacking of to a picture of me' cards?
Pizza toast. It's like pizza but on toast. BC we are broke. OMG its so good.
You would never do this sober.
Then she said I give the best mouth hugs and bar went silent.
the fat lady is now rubbing her stomach and staring at me. I hate trains
I'm ok. I've got the pantsless-with-dignity thing down pat
Hey, I told her the bathroom was a "No fly zone" after I used it. She willingly allowed her nose to go through that pain. It's her fault, she only supplied me with vodka when she knows I only drink rum.
the fact that you have a guy named the "i want you to tie me up and fuck me" guy speaks volumes about your life.
well he said my boobs made him believe in love at first sight so that's cool
They're giving you narcotics aren't they?
If I offered to share would you come visit me?
That song just makes me wanna take off my top and shake my titties all around the club.
Randomize
