Fiestas. Its like a classier verson of mardi gras.
i don't care what she did to you. we are not having sex in front of your sister.
Andrew is trying to convince me that i took your virginity. Please tell me he is lying.
define virginity.
grab my backpack.....its in the fridge
Her bed is on wheels, so we woke up in the kitchen.
Hope your thanksgiving is a complete blowjob festival.
I have a new philosophy. Fuck wearing bras, it's summertime.
just walked across campus with a bottle of champagne in between my boobs. night two and the quest for classiness is already over
I had to help him get his zipper down in front of his dad so he could pee in the bushes. That Is what moonshine does to you.
Why did this happen to me why did I have to meet him if I could go back in time I never would have grabbed his dick
Came home plastered at 8am. Roommate had hot glued all the ashtrays and various items to their surfaces. Couldn't handle it. Went back to the bar.
Hella random but just hear me out...A bar that is a petting zoo. Bitches love petting zoos.
How long until you're healed?
Physically? A week or so. Emotionally? The scars of dislocating my knee at a frat and flashing my panties to the whole crowd wi never heal.
just the thought of you slurpin down noodles really rustles my jimmy
you suck at sexting
Honestly the prospect of dick really lifts a girl's spirits
Randomize
