Scared. last time someone tried to talk me into they said it tastes like tapioca and i projectiled onto a closed window
why didn't we just drop out of school years ago and become dominatrix bitches who beat men?
I don't know but we should still do that
No, that was before the police came, but after the hooker.
I got to watch him fuck me from behind in the reflection of an ornament. so glad I decorated.
They're like penises that have been put in a blender.
I've crashed the car, it's a write off. The police are here and I'm dressesd as a crayon.
it's a "shave your legs in the cvs bathroom" kind of night
Like my mouth was on his pelvis connected to his balls that's how far it was
Obviously you've never slept with someone who was deliverance level inbred.
We found you in the middle of the road chucking gravel because "the house was too far away".
Just took a piss in some random bushes in a traffic jam and had to sprint back to the car. I'm a boss.
Dude, half of south Mississippi has seen my taint. I'm not worried.
Pretty good. Thinking about getting day drunk and filling out job applications so I don't hate myself as much
There's a kitten on my face and I'm druuuunk
I got arrested FOR running from the cops. In college Dad got arrested and THEN ran from the cops. So it could be worse.
Randomize
