Sundresses, hats, and big glasses. That is the greatest trick the devil ever taught women.
Hey its bob the builder. Where did you go?
so high i just made my own version of grilled cheese using toast and spray cheese
here comes the puke
I was really disturbed by what initially appeared to be a dismembered head sitting beside you. Then I realized you were laying on her body.
I think drinking everclear was a better idea than taking a night class.
The only pictures I have are of me being stoned or me looking like a man, which do you prefer?
You coulda licked the floor this morning and got drunk.
so I'm staring at this cat and wondering..is the tail of the cat the derivative of it's head?
stop getting stoned after studying for a calc final.
I'm drinking and working out! I'm bench pressing the beer pong table and doing push ups and lifting the chair.
I think my boss gives me work off weekends because he doesn't want me showing up hungover anymore..
Omg this is like trying to sleep on a pile of ballsacks.
Visibly drunk girl eating alone at a souplantation just spilled salad all over her body. It was me
Yeah like stabbing myself through the eye with a coffee stir and bleeding out all over the office rug
His sister hates me so I took his virginity on her bed
While finding our clothes afterwards he says..."So do we like have to talk after this?"
Randomize
