I just found out the guys at work had a bet as to who could sleep with me before i move away.
Who won?
All of them.
i just dont know how to see an unattractive person as more than a friend
Correction, I've been on a lot of dates and a lot of dicks
coming out of a blackout being surrounded by Disney police was not as awesome as it sounds.
there is a strobe light in my taxi. in what way is this safe.
You realize we were screaming in the car about our apartment next year because we can "bring home randoms whenever we want" and "stare at each other from our door ways"
I saw him and didn't have sex with him. Responsibility five!
I climbed through his window to find him already with another booty call. This wouldn't have happened if I could upgrade from my 7th grade scooter to a real car.
…If I were you I wouldn't use that as part of your argument to your dad for a car
Went out with the family last night and some 40 yr old lady wanted to take me home. My mom was not happy with me
He texted his hospitalized grandma while inside me, so really a perfect gentleman.
There was a clear and well defined point last night where I could've decided to go home but no now I've woken up with glitter all over my nuts and potentially an std or 2
We didn't have a place to have sex. So we timed the automatic car wash & spent $9 for 3 minutes and 45 secs of car sex.
You kept sayin "its alright, I'm pre-med" to everything we said. EVERYTHING.
You have thirteen minutes to get here if you want to get back together. Otherwise I'm getting digits from the waitress.
Try me, you 5'5 gremlin
Randomize
