so... another position just opened up(704) Oh really?(704) Is it John's?(704) Or did you find a new way to take a penis?
Ooooh. That's not a mole. Uncomfortable.
dude,it's memorial day.not getting wasted=you're a terrorist
i just burped and it tasted like condom. please tell me i wasn't lame and made that guy wear one for a bj last night.
better to have posed nude and lost than to never have posed nude at all...thats what i always say
Today's dinner table topic: the probablity of my dad turning gay if he ever left my mom.
2nd fun fact: he has a square tan line around his dick.
She said she wants to move in with me. Time to black out and act as if we never had this conversation.
How are you a firefighter? People actually trust you with their lives??
He left my apartment when I broke up with him just as my booty call was walking in. It was a little awkward...
Dude, the lecture theatre is caving in on me.
Going through my bras is like traveling back in time through my past hookups and relationships....
Taco Bell is giving high school kids free tacos STEAL YOUR BROTHER'S WALLET I'LL BRING THE WEED.
i like him enough to wash my sheets.. but not enough to finally get that pink lemonade and vodka slushy stain out of my carpet
Julius Caesar had a huge penis
WTF are you reading?
Ha ha! No, the guy in the Caesar costume last night. We hooked up. His dick was huge
If there's someone that knows accidental pantlessness, it's Mike.
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