He said he was just looking at my pictures and was thinking about how he wanted to cut my hair..then dye it black and put platnium blonde extensions throughout it and layer my hair
the 24 hour champagne diet aint going so well
If i'm not hungover, near death, and wondering what i did the night before on Monday, life is not worth living.
apparently i was just sitting there with my shirt down holding my boobs saying "its ok. its all gonna be ok"
So, how do I go about conveying: I'm sorry, yet very glad she is having my abortion. Via text msg?
I just imagined your drunkass eating Taco Bell in my living room. This is the Godmother of my potential child.
and now her best friend is massaging my table under the leg. this may not end well.
FACT: the parking lot attendant was yelling "NO SEX HERE! NO SEX" at yall.
Even though we had just had to physically take her off of someones lawn she was peeing on when they came outside, she still insisted on walking unassisted the rest of the way home. It was dignity meets shit show.
LEAVE MY LITTLE DICK OUT OF THIS
She ran from her surprise party screaming "I'm not ready for an intervention." Yeah, the girl has a problem.
I tried to take a cute nude but sneezed halfway through. I sent it anyway
Just ignore the penis. It's won't bother you. I promise.
He literally just laid flat on top of me motionless at one point. It felt less like foreplay and more like he was trying to use me as a flotation device. 0/10
Those brownies did us in. I honestly blacked out completely.
What brownies? Ohmygod.
Randomize
