i am fully taking advantage of taking advantage of him
then she made me sanitize my hands before fingering her...i may have found my soulmate
I'm currently using two paint brushes as chopsticks to eat lasagna.... college.
Chances are I'll be there for your wedding. Camelbaks filled with jack and coke are appropriate attire, right?
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They evidently had to pull his penis out of me while we were passed out on the floor.
I whispered "you're doing a great Job" when he was fucking me. Then high fived him.
Hahah what did you even say to him?!
That I was gonna inflate his vagina with a leaf blower?
Oh.
You called me at 3 am laughing like an idiot. Apparently you consider breaking out of the hospital to be a lifetime achievement.
Apparently I'm short enough to sit on his lap and fuck him while he is driving because the cop didn't notice.
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But for real, I had the best sex of my life on that bunk bed
Ah well. Drinking wouldn't be drinking without mystery bruises
Agreed.
Yeah I'd rather get obliterated at home.
Same here. I'd like to ensure that I won't get pissed on.
She drunkenly dropped her ranch for her pizza. She tried to clean it up with her hands off the street then realized it didn't work and started licking her fingers.
Mom saw my dick pic over my gf's shoulder. She told her she really should've had me circumcised.
Cancel your plans for the fourth someone is streaming iron chef on twitch
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