shes wearing a jean skirt, its frayed. i got this
after he passed out we removed everything electronic from his room, stuck in some old books and an ancient typewriter from goodwill. for 20 min. we had him convinced he'd drunk himself backward in time.
What happened at the top of the stairs is never to be spoken of again.
Look dude I'm sorry I used your bong to snorkel in my bathtub last night
I think I found an E pill under the couch.. Or really bad tasting candy. Check back in 30min this could get exciting
i proceeded to stick my hands in his pants while he continued to repeat i have a girlfriend
ill be fine wheb you get back. I'm gunna do real world things like washing the dishes. having to perform serious tasks brings you down.
Responsibility: Hiding your beer when your DWI clients who are out on bond come to talk to you at bars.
why would you automatically assume i'm high...
you just told me you're eating the powder of a lemonade mix.
I just commented on the education level of his penis.
The last thing I remember was you puking all over the inside of my door and him yelling "PUKING RALLY!!!"
i'm at work, alone, drinking a spiced chai & fireball hot toddy. holiday OT isn't that bad after all.
he literally walked in took a shit and left ringing the 'great service' bell on the way out.
I almost wrecked my car because of a guy in skinny jeans had a boner
She said cowgirls can can pee standing up and proceeded to pull up her dress and drop her underwear.
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