I Bought a bracelet with bible characters and a charm broke. the virgin mary one. Do you think it's a sign?
Had sex with him. My tampon is now in my brain. May need surgery.
Um I just overheard that the new guy spent a month in jail. Obvi another great hire.
knew it was a bad idea. the look she gave me when i left her roommates bedroom in the morning really illustrated that.
what the fuck is a social media consultant, who does she consult for, and how bad is she at it? her facebook account is currently hacked and posting ads for the ipad 2 on my newsfeed
my first words to him the next morning were "do you like magic"?
If court goes my way we are flying to Vegas.
I think I ate my cheesy fiesta potatoes cup.
My arms are still sore. Apparently, lube wrestling is the best workout ever.
Wow. The LSU Tennessee game is on here and the LSU cheerleaders are stupid hot. Its weird having a hard on. At a bar. On a Wednesday. By yourself.
how much of this shit do i need to take before i think its a good idea to set the house on fire and scream satanic mantras?
My hookup from last weekend apparently got arrested today... his roommate just tagged me on facebook asking for bail money.
you woke me up at 1am last night high on cough syrup to tell me jay z was an idiot for cheating on beyonce
Sorry I steam cleaned at 1:30 in the morning and that i'm such a drunk dumb child. On the bright side, my carpet has ever looked better.
cinco de mayo stole my toenail
cinco de mayo stole my virginity.
Randomize
