I googled Canada's legal age of consent. I have good news. It's 14. Justin Bieber here I come...
come over i need a lifeguard for my shower
he stopped making out with me and said "can I make you grilled cheese? I feel like I owe YOU something"
Just croosed over that too drunk for chemistry class line
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Unemployment check just came in. As soon as I stop pretending I have morals I'm buying weed. Puff puff pass uncle sam.
She said we could only have sex if she got to keep her fake moustache on during
So like 5 seconds in I realize I knew him in 3rd grade and I went limp in his mouth. It felt like I just murdered the last unicorn ever. Going straight never felt like an option till now.
I've decided I'm going to drink again. More. Day drinking. Night drinking. Everything. It's the responsible thing to do since I'm not pregnant
i'm not sure what happened last night.. i do remember the police calling me to find out where i was because apparently at some point i went missing? don't worry though. they found me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We compared her boobs to bacon. I'm probably going to have to justify that.
She couldn't understand why my walking in on her 70 year old parents ruined any chance of a boner for at least an hour. I think she's too slow for me to fornicate with.
Do you think showing up at his door with bourbon and chicken is too forward?
I didn't really understand how big 10 inches is. Now I know.
Nate is still in lock up because when the cop informed me he'd shit his pants in the squad car I declined to post bail.
Just boned her on my desk. on top of my term paper. take that professor dipshit
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