Hoooooo maaaaan
Yes?
I'm retarded. Again.
I knew I shouldn't have slept with her...my dick looks like a stegosaurus tail
Having sex with her was like reading the Wall Street Journal.
do herpes really smell.
med student doing my blood work at the AIDS clinic just hit on me after I told him i was having unprotected sex, but didn't think i had HIV.
I'm going to need to borrow your helmet cam for my Wednesday night blackouts.
My dads not up on pop culture but he's not dumb enough to believe your 2 girls 1 cup reference at dinner was from the bible.
He's the conductor of the struggle bus
I RODE THAT FINE PIECE OF STRUGGLE BUS
He pointed at me, then leaned in and said "shes the best at blow jobs" then chris fist pumped him and said "dude, I know"
Blacked in cold and wet, with them areound me singing Aaaaall we are saaaaayiiiing is YOU PEED YOUR PANTS
Dude so help me god I WILL weigh a penis one day
Ok you had this coming you put a sponsored filter on a dick pic
Oh yeah, it was definitely the best sex of my life, I just don't think I can fix the kitchen table before my parents get back...
I dropped my pants and she just stared until she asked how is that even possible? Best night ever lmao
How far are you from my house? Do I have time to masturbate before you get here?
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