I reminded them that I didn't puke and I cleaned yours up! So huh!
ID DO HER
SHE HAS LUMPS OF DEODORANT IN HER ARMPIT, I THINK ONE FELL IN YOUR DRINK
she was using a pencil to fish crushed adderall out of a plastic bag. it was like a college version of fun dip
i feel as if last night was a right of passage. to officially be an adult you must have a drunken one night stand with a co-worker and go to work the next day still drunk wearing yesterday's clothes...
they were just spraying pledge on themselves and calling it lemon cologne.
He is passed out on the kitchen floor. He will fight you if you disturb him. Just a warning.
Having drunken flash backs of me giving you a piggy back ride. I was like Jesus, and you were my cross. I fell so many times for you. This is true friendship.
So I drew a giant robot attacking a city on the chem test. My TA colored in the fire on the burning building
Hah, I lost the lenses in my glasses, didn't event notice til this morning... How was the meeting?
WHY DO YOU ALWAYS PUT THE PLUG IN THE SINK BEFORE YOU PUKE IN IT
Just threw up. It looks like I may have swallowed a cigarette.
Just to prove a point, she called and ordered a pizza 10 min before she ordered the blow and it still got here first. I may never leave LA.
I told you!!! And that is why he's the drug dealer to the stars.
he said didn't have much sexual experience and then proceeded to tell me he is going to make me cum harder than my vibrator could
well, that escalated quicky
No, you made a silk sheet toga and held up a dildo calling yourself "The Statue of Puberty". People made pilgrimages from the other party down the block to see you.
YOU UNCULTURED BADGER
Randomize