Yah man, that place is surreal
Man, I'm from Tennessee. What the fuck is surreal?
why do guys feel they can ask questions when im blowing them? you'd think they'd know my answer will always be "mmhmhmhmmm"
dude you apologized to her after she called you stupid. you were like "no i'm sorry, you shouldn't have to be around stupid people, it's my fault"
no you're not listening to me HE WANTED TO BRAID MY HAIR
so you told her it was a 'nam scar? i mean, how old does she think you are.
At some point we were all eating banana flavored rolling papers.
I feel like "stop licking my face" isn't something that needs to be repeated twice
They didn't have a "sorry I was late for your birthday party because I was getting arrested" card.
You said "bag of dicks" before passing out and falling off the landing
Oh god... Please tell me Sarah didn't see me like this
...you may have kinda punched her in the tit on the way down...
No just a slight sexual miscommunication which led to a little (lot) vomiting by one party and a bruised sternum on the other party involved.
I can't even make a guess how that goes.
Sex and sushi don't even sound good right now... I might be on my death bed. To my Liz, I leave my extensive movie collection and my drinking supplies. To Olive I leave my car. Cause every Scottish terrier needs a 2010 Camaro.
Then I'll go home and you two can do whatever two same sex heterosexual soul mates do
I got drunk and tried to make special rice krispie treats, but I made a mess and they were all stuck to my hands, so I just decided to eat my way out of the catastrophe and I think shit's about to get even weirder than usual.
I need to stop acting like a porn star that isn't getting paid
he high fived his dick after we had sex
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