We named our party play list daddy issues
I'm retiring my vagina. Better yet I'm Farve-ing it.
Def the best call fo sho
That way it can come out of retirement anytime and play for different teams. And it can wear Wranglers.
OMG THIS GUYS LICENSE PLATE IS GETTNHRWET
he got instantly turned off in the middle of a blowjob when he heard the news "twilight beat the blockbuster record of batman"
no where in the syllabus does it say "no alcoholic beverages allowed".
I'll just wear something slutty to the liquor store and hope for the best
that's your solution for everything
Your therapist is not going to think that you using your vagina as revenge is okay
Just mindlessly walked into the mens bathroom. My vagina has now become its own independent being, looking for penises. I'm just along for the ride.
You gotta hand it to him. 6 hours in a new town and he's already fuck someone, had his ass kick by her bf, and rounded up a posse of people to kick this guys ass.
Did you blackout Saturday before or after we had sex in a random snow bank?
Do you understand how hard it is to go down on a guy underwater? Didn't think so....
I'm finally in my bed, my pants are off, and there's no pee on my carpet this is the best life has been all day
I woke up to pizza pinned to my wall. So that's that.
I get stoned and write a 15 page history report in two hours. She gets stoned and cries because she "doesn't know which shade of pink is the real one".
My hands smell like vagina and ham.
Randomize