Dude you just kept yelling "She was my first asain!" right in front of her.
I did that thing where I cum for no reason again.
she had condoms in her med. cabinet - magnums -I don't think I'm tall enough for this ride
Girls only wine night turned into a sloppy drunk lesbian orgy again
I think you'll appreciae more than anyone that I'm renting my parking spot out for a half gallon of vodka a month.
The condom broke. Its OK tho, turns out I was just humping her thigh for 20 minutes. Jager dude, Jager.
dude my grandma just called my dealer. How does this shit happen to me
Just a warning... Flip, sip, or strip always ends in all participants being naked. Learning from experience.
Prob because you've thrown up alot. As long as its not like pure blood you're fine. Drink water.
Well anyways I still cant believe I don't remember such a monumental day in history as you showing me your boobs... Jesus
I hope. Last year I got lost in New Orleans and some guy named Cookie walked me home while I cried.
It’s like a buffet of marriages! Every option is available to you!
Btw, remind me to tell you about how I had to cancel my crazy wild sex plans with Will b/c my roommate came back from his trip after a day b/c Canada wouldn't let him in. Fucking cockblock.
Actually that's the whole story. You don't have to remind me.
I'm starting to think my emotional health is declining because I was watching transformers today and legit almost started crying
i survived drinking for 24 hours, an 8 ball of cocaine and a threesome. I think you can handle moving.
Randomize
