is it bad that I sent her a picture of my penis on her husbands birthday?
I just recorded courtney puking and set it as my ringtone.
Finished drinking tea out of a red party cup when I was done I flipped it without even thinking
I need a DD tuesday morning around 9 AM
I'm scared to ask why.....
1st bikini wax. Jose Cuervo is helping me prepare.
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i was surprised by the severity of his small dick condition
He is offering to pay me back by sending me a dick pic.
My thoughts exactly.
Just walked in on the Yellow Ranger getting porked by a guy in a UD Blue Hen costume. Will somebody PLEASE think of the children.
Is there a technical name for reverse cowgirl? I'm trying to maintain a little dignity with my mother here
Just realized the guy is in my class. Unless there's another guy that had half his ear bit off at a St. Patty's party
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How was that my fault?! I made you breakfast and gave you cake, as you asked. Then, you initiated sexual activity.
I'm going to need a Jurassic park sized pooper scooper to deal with all this shit last night caused.
When i like your selfie it means one of two things. 1. thats a nice photo, friend. OR 2. I wanna bend you over a table. But youll never know.
Let's just says his mouth writes a lot of checks that his penis just can't cash. Don't waste your time.
You think I'll get the "I used to stick it to your daughter" discount?
how do you make "fuck me in the break room" sound casual?