Just met a synchronized swimmer, can you imagine the things she could do in the water
Legs for days
while fucking on the counter the whip cream was conveniently right next to us. i love thanksgiving
i have a "get your shit together" dinner with my parents tonight. After that ill be down to party
You tried to pay the bartender in graduation checks, I think you'll be fine in the real world.
These Dirty People Haven’t Told Their SO About Their Kinky Fetish
Im in the bathtub drunk. Less than an hour before the interview. This will be the best or worst career move ever., support?
Katie told the cabby "when the boat docks I'm getting off with you"
She was to tired for head so she opted for a footjob with poor results. I dont want to talk about it
Cassie is wearing a baseball cap. This rebound is going nowhere
Making drunken Mac n cheese at 3 am I understand why witches constantly stir their cauldrons. Much more homogenized temperature and slim chance of boiling over. Good job witches.
This is Why People Stop Sex Halfway Through
The last thing I remember is talking to the firefighter next to me and he was giving me fruit.
That was the first time I ever heard of a female getting road head while driving... thanks for the memory and making me happy ending..
If I die here, tell my vagina and my cats that I'm sorry.
He dated a girl who could do the damn splits on his dick like how do you compete with that
I can't believe he's mad at you for not remembering your fake anniversary.
The day I let him eat me out will be the day that Donald trump is an honest, kind, non-bigoted member of society