HOW IN THE HELL DID YOU BLOW A .24?????
We were watching I'm a celebrity get me out of here and taking shots every time heidi said HALLELUJAH, and started spraying her hair with that stupid dry shampoo shit....and we only watched the last half hour.
Make me a promise>>> if you ever see the brats from that tv show NYC Prep walking around, you will trip them, and you wil throw drinks on them
I saw two morbidly obese women get winded after fighting over the last motorized wheelchair at Walmart
These are the moments in life you observe a force greater than us at work
im probably the most hungover person watchin icarly right now
I will miss his soup and his dick the most
Dude Eric's high and buying everyone taquitos. How much room do we have in the freezer?
He was trying to be aggressive in bed, but in reality, it was like watching a declawed cat try to climb a curtain. They WANT it, they just can't DO it.
Using your ex girlfriend's little brother to pick up women at the a&p: priceless
I woke up to a full mcdonalds meal being shoved in my face. Mom mustve noticed the empty tequila bottle. I love family.
it is shots o' clock and I am never late
A special kind of bond is formed between two people when they act as a pee shield for one another for drunken pisses in an alleyway
I'm sorry I told you to go fuck yourself after you said good morning to me when I was hungover.
A guy at my table is reading a magazine called "Cheese Connoisseur"
I was simply suggesting that you really should try coke bondage sex.
Sorry I missed your call earlier. I was getting high with my high school band teacher.
Randomize