You're a womanizer and a bitch.
I've come to the conclusion that if I was an old man, I would perve around in short gym shorts for kicks.
are you wasted or are you getting laid?
ebdebdebdebd
wow
2 v-cards in one night. impossible is nothing.
you know that hot chick that stutters? talk about an awkward orgasm
our school mascot just walked into class and threw condoms everywhere. welcome to college
Hey had an urgent voicemail from the Illinois national guard....have you been using my identity for your blackout weekend?
Yes and yes
Yea we slept in ur room but im 80% sure we didnt have any peanut butter in there
He is the blood diamond of hook ups. You think you want it...but you don't
New one-upper goal: I have to shit off the side of a moving train then jump off
i dont know whats worse..that i woke up in a gorilla suit or that its covered in peanut butter
Drunk Karaoke resulted in only 8 injuries this time, so there is some improvement.
I tipped him really well because I feel he knew we were high, but did it in a non judgemental way.
she has no right to get mad at us for drinking during the wedding. she's the one that chose the bridesmaid dresses with pockets.
Are you ok? Who pooped in my office?
Randomize
