Don't really want to talk about it. You were right. She had a whole jar of toenail clippings on her nightstand that she chews on "when her fingernails are too short." Direct quote.
why didn't we just drop out of school years ago and become dominatrix bitches who beat men?
I don't know but we should still do that
Draw a picture of yourself puking and peeing on her and give it to her with a note that sys this could be your future if you be my friend
Just woke up in a hotel next to a 38 year old mom who's married... I think Spring Break has started
It's not fair. Guys with dicks that huge should not be allowed to be catholic.
He adopted an old drug sniffing dog so that he won't lose his weed around the house anymore. It works.\n
apparently the bartender would rather give me free shots than tell me that my whole nipple piercing was hanging out
Does buying my brother condoms for Christmas say "keep having sex with her, I like her" or "dear god, do not get this girl pregnant"?
Well it ended with everyone taking a bite out of a raw potato and a girl crying because her boyfriend wouldn't bring her any grape juice. So yeah...I'd say the night was a success.
I mean, unless you wanna just let me lie there while you fuck me and pour water into my mouth
see that vagina ? that vagina means business
Don't let me publish my memoir unless "hurt my ankle drunk irish dancing" is at least the title of a chapter because that is really the whole story of my life.
I threw up in the shower. I cleaned it all up and there is on mess at all. This hangover has become borderline religous. Powerful and life changing.
First contact since we had sex and it's to get my HBO password. I sure pick winners huh
He tried to grab your ass, but he grabbed my hand cause I grabbed your ass first. I saved your ass..literally. Your welcome.
Randomize
