How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
i realized my work ethic and productivity really improves if i masturbate on my lunch break.
i almost got kicked out of the rave because i was trying to get in on some couple's makeout sessions
Someone left a shot of disaronno in a champagne glass here this morning... flip a coin?
I didn't realize how much I missed him until his balls were back in my mouth..
Omg considering I am covered in cake and probably cocaine that is the greatest news I have ever heard
Where would I incorporate "your boyfriend fucked the shit out of me last night" before or after Merry Christmas bitch?
Have the decency to NOT HANG YOU'RE USED CONDOM ON THE FOOSEBALL HANDLES! Dickhead.
it went ok. then he slept in a parking lot and took me out for a picnic the next day. boys are confusing.
The fact that he quoted freebird as his breakup speech was a little more classy than expected
When she saw "buy condoms" on my to do list she figured out pretty quick we were breaking up.
We were both too drunk to drive home. So we did it in the coat closet and then I walked home. 20/20 hindsight: Could have both walked to my apartment and then had sex there.
Pretty much all i've had today is sugar and orgasms
I can't even be mad at customs in houstons airport anymore for missing my flight and having to stay overnight. Within an hour of meeting we did it at her place. Her last word being "glad I could show you real southern hospitality". I'm definitely coming back here someday
Do not tell me I cant do drunk math ever again, AND I made a creative way of telling him I want him to fuck me.
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