love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
she peed. on the sidewalk. it is 2 pm. Help.
I wish they could condense everything I needed, nutritionally speaking, into mike and ikes
I literally told her "she's a sandwich I'd like to make" and that's all it took
I can't believe he let me cut his hair as stoned as I was.. I think I even cut my own hair too
My younger brother just got high fives from all my guy cousins for fucking my best friend. I hate family gatherings.
The novelty of Nekkid Straight Roommate has faded.
Not much. Some creepy guy on Grindr thinks he knows who I am and where I live. So I sent him to that place with jockstraps and bacon. Hope he has fun.
I can tell right now that knowing you will either be really fun or ruin my life
i’m just listening to christina aguilera’s “your body” on repeat and trying not to pass out at my desk.
idk man, I was fucked up and eating fried rice at the grocery store, tried to wave at her but she just looked concerned at me.
P.s. I wore your shirt today and it has your blood all over it, but I am at a funeral home and they are using embalming fluid to get your blood stains out right now.
Everybody posting sickening holiday couple pics and I'm over here deepthroating a bottle of whiskey.
We just had sex on an abandoned logging road while wearing snow shoes. God bless Montana boys.
I see more hoeing in ur future
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