Kelly, is this rhetorical, or sarcastic? You are very kind & quite beautiful, but we never really evolved into anything & your prevailing ambivalence spoke more than words ever could.
"We" really do not exist-if we ever did. Both of us may have been hoping for more than was possible.
I would enjoy sitting down to talk about the dissolution, but think it may end up being counter productive.
how did you get vomit on both your shoulders. I mean think about it.
The Masters... another excuse to excessivly start drinking by 1
I just got home. Seriously all I remember is taking out my contacts and putting your balls in my mouth.
I was hitting on her while she was puking ... yeah i was pretty drunk
careful of the bathroom.... theres some drunken ninja turtles in there....
That was the first time I have seen a confused expression with a dick in the mouth
I have a way to get him back. you're going to have to take one for the team and make a visit to the health department. you in?
Im in mikes bed telling my vagina I'm sorry in advance.
He said and I quote "Had to beat one off in the Burger King bathroom before I went over." Thats somebody that takes pride in his work.
Antibacterial soap and prayers does not for spermicide make
This girl invited us back on the promise of weed and strudel...she delivered neither.
How to not get laid: tell him he reminds you of your brother. While having sex. Thanks, vodka.
I'll call you on my way home
Oh my god I'm going to die between now and then... can you at least tell me if y'all hooked up???
I've seen too many naked penises for this to be a normal Monday morning
Randomize
