i threw up in a trash can last night at kellys irish times. but in a trash can because i'm a lady
He uses pillows to masturbate.
Hawaiian shirts and no dignity
We are always on the same wavelength...kinda eerie.
I know man...but i cant pass up a catholic school girl fantasy
Osama's death just kick started our Cinco de mayo celebration. Margaritas for anyone wearing red white and blue!
It was honestly the most delicious alcohol I've ever drank, plus the added risk of going blind from methanol poisoning really enhanced the experience.
There's jack Daniels coming out of my eyes instead of tears.
Fucking her would be like seeing big foot, finding a four leaf clover , petting a unicorn, and arm wrestling a leprechaun in a matter of a 6 hour period
You passed out with your mouth on the faucet, straddling the keg, with your arms wrapped around it
Ya I don't think I'm going anywhere, a cum towel, beer, and Vicodin was just exchanged in our white elephant present game
I woke up naked to an alarm set for 11:18 pm and missing a shoe. How was your night?
The most adult decision I've mad today was Jameson or Fireball? It's been a successful Day
That shit was hard as fuck. It felt like a mountain entering my vagina.
I just got baptized.
Drunkenly skinny dipping in a indoor hotel pool is not okay and does not count as a baptism.
he had to stop me from eating snow off the street on the way back to pick up our cars. that's how hungover i am.
Randomize
