hey remember that time we got really drunk, you tried to find narnia in my refrigerator and passed out in the freezer drawer??
no.
On the quad today: An amish choir singing something weird, and not 30 feet away 3 girls tanning topless. Definition of diversity.
Saved By The Bell: The College Years had it waaaay wrong on that one.
Once again there IS no outside bathroom. Never has been, that is the balcony
do you ever get flashbacks of ppl you had sex with and just shudder at how gross they were/how drunk you were?
story of my life.
I maybe just had sex outside in broad daylight. At a state park. Please be proud.
Came to from my blackout with native american warrior facepaint on I'm too old for this shit
The facepaint not the blacking out
Sometimes I wonder if my parents know that I mean horny when I say lonely.
That's the only definition of lonely that I know.
After he finished going down on me he came up from under the covers, threw his hands into the air and shouted "take that lesbians!" and finished with "and we have dicks!"
I'm sitting on the floor singing Bruno mars while they cook and occasionally pet me
YOU DESERVE A GUY WITH A NORMAL DICK DONT SETTLE FOR ANYTHING LESS
If it snows I'm making an igloo and getting wasted in it
i just realized I haven't been laid all summer. So sad. What a waste of a perfectly good vagina.
I'm not sure why he thinks weird that I masturbate AND look at pinterest at the same time.
You tore a poster off a lamppost and ATE IT. That drunk.
Randomize
