That's intense
I learned much from the teen babysitter: I can light a cigarette in a microwave.
he wanted me to dress up like someone from lord of the rings. I dumped him.
U of I kids don't fist pump to Sweet Caroline. Get me the fuck out of here.
He came and then made the Jim Halpert face. does that say disappointment or what
I started drinking at 10.30am. Ive got a solid buzz, ive decided holidays are to be treated like gamedays
you decided to have a spaghetti fight but then you got greedy and decided to eat it all.
You nicknamed her "lazy eye" and were screaming across the bar at her to buy you a drink...
you trust me enough to eiffel tower a girl but don't trust me with a mallet wtf happened to our friendsship
dude a monday night stripper made you motorboat her. you should get that checked out
U thinks that's bad? He told me that he had to envision high school wrestling in order to bust a nut with some girl
Her weave came out on the dance floor. She was twerking and shaking one minute and her hair flew across the dance floor the next. Great way to be introduced to the family
I'm pretty sure the guy on the dance floor with crutches just smacked me in the butt with one. Do you think he's flirting?
Is it something I'm going to want to hug you for or slap you for?
I feel a blackout coming on
Plz don't have me burst into your house saying you're late for re airport to rescue you from a fat girl again
That was 2 times
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