wow. When I'm done with him he's going to have to pop his collar in necessity and not just douchery
she fell down the flight of stairs and was fine until she saw the two broken beer bottles on the ground by her.
thats a woman
We still on for coffee?
Cream and sugar. Deliver to planned parenthood in 45.
I said geronimo as I came I'm not sure if he appreciated the doctor who reference or was just confused
I take pride in being a married 31 year old who sleeps on her best friend's bathroom floor from time to time.
who was i chillin with last night? i woke up in a storage unit
Fuck you fireball...just straight up fuck out of here
I tried to take a cute nude but sneezed halfway through. I sent it anyway
if you're not jumping for joy when you see penis then you're looking at the wrong ones.
Only thing exciting about him was his dick.
I will be the DD but everyone has to call me Mistress
The next time you scream bombs away when you are inside me will be the last time you are inside me
There's literally not a single picture of him with a shirt on. I can't talk to him without dislocating my eye balls.
Guess who just set half their backyard on fire.
Please tell me youre joking.
Nope. on the brightside though, im really gonna quit smoking this time.
Actually new year, new me. I haven’t had sex yet so technically I’ve been a virgin all year.
Randomize
