she didnt even puke last nite, shes finally hit champion status. i think im in love
oh good, I think they're gone
the painters?
my herpes
Then I opened the closet and then i found the babies
woke up in my one night stand's bed and barfed all over her floor. she came back from the bathroom, looked at the vomit, looked at me and said "normally i'd tell you to clean it and get the fuck out, but i remember the sex was good, so i'll let it go." Score.
Going to.goingto.gtoing to DIE DIE DIEEEE......i feel like everyeone impotrant in my life like MLK is judging me.... saddd day
we knew we'd be okay when we walked up to the dealers house and he asked us to please be quiet as to not wake his nana.
I just peed in a flower pot on the veranda while crying and holding a drink
Prop 8 repealed and I FINALLY got my period. Good day for America!!!
Hey I'm sorry for head butting you last night. Personally I thought it was funny at the time, but I can see how from your perspective it may not have been as enjoyable for you... Hope your lip is okay.
you said I shouldn't try to fill the void in my meaningless life with dicks but i am trying and it totally works
So for St Paddys day I colored my junk green and got a little hat for him....wanna see it before I sober up....
Sneezing cum all over the table was not the highlight of the family reunion if that tells you anything
did you know that sneaking into a golf course at midnight is a felony? the cop made sure to tell us after she peed on the course and hit on him
As long as it's more "this is where i see an issue" vs "psst.... tiddies" then i have no argument
Grandma said I got a good handjob. I think she meant manicure.
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