I'm at his house. He has VELCRO shoes. I'm too desperate to leave...I may need help in thee life dept
I decided you couldn't drive after you asked where the time circuits were on your Altima
I wanted to see November 5, 1985
He showed me a four inch blond hair that grows out of his side. He calls it his little ray of sunshine. Please come get me.
those are the first brownies ive had since i was 13 that didnt have weed in them.
I can now tell my grandchildren Central Park has really great spots for quickies...
I may or may not be negotiating a deal of baked goods for socks...keep you posted
I think drinking everclear was a better idea than taking a night class.
Now I'm heckling that my belch is more exciting than their fireworks and I peed down the driveway.
There was a group of girls next to us. One was smiling at me. I only remember walking up and saying "oh you're Russian". Not sure where it went from there
Oddly enough I feel totally fine now. Clonazapam and red bull the breakfast of champions.
A little, yeah. We were stealing firewood from the neighbors (drunk), and figured it would be 10 times harder to be angry with us if we got caught if we were naked, and 100% more hilarious.
best eviction party ever.
it wasn't an eviction party you asshole, you just happened to get yourself evicted during the party.
Just sent a dick pic to ur girl. It was accident. Plz mail it to Gena.
Our prom king just sent me a dick pic. I know it's 10 years later but I feel like I've finally made it.
My eye was non-stop itchy for like an hour... I thought burying my face in your ass caught up with me
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