Just saw a group of asian tourists in safari outifts bow in thanks to the starbucks guys. And no Im not high.
Her parents walked in on us. So for my birthday they bought me a blow-up doll with their daughters face on it. I don't know what to think right now.
No fucking idea. Just paid for my chipotle in chocolate coins, though. Either there is a huge language barrier happening here, or my big boobs are finally paying off.
we found you in the closet, clutching coats that werent yours for stability
These People Are The Epitome of Lazy
I pretty much just threw a bunch of clothes and my vodka in a bag..idk where I'm gonna end up tonight but I'm prepared.
you're like that jamaican tarat card reading chick... only with herpes
I walked out of the store holding my face and a lady pulled her daughter away from me as I then threwup in the parking lot
I'm pretty sure that when my parents bought me those savings bonds they thought it would go towards something useful like tuition. Not your bail.
I told you I'd buy you lunch.
Haha, oh man. I'm awake now. Slept in my headdress.
Disturbing Scenes People Witnessed As Children
You kept yelling "wood grain wheel" and grinding on fat chicks.
The hell is wrong with me
I think that "I fucked your little brother" wasn't the best way to introduce yourself.....
Are you up yet? I really want to know if i tried sleeping in a field... i have the vaguest memory of trying to
At a point I was just cumming dust last night
Walked in on my roommate covering his dick in blue frosting. Am staying with my folks for the Forth. See you Monday if the brain bleach works.
Thanks so much for having me, I'm really sorry that I almost caused your dog to catch on fire and also for breaking your doorknob