I might come over and watch a movie but I can't spend the night. my parents would wonder where i was
you're 26.
Dude I'm telling you, conditioner is the best for jerking it in the shower. It feels great and afterwards everything is all smooth
She stuck a Big Gulp bend-y straw up his ass to see if he could handle anal.
Ew, and?!
Well he couldn't and the deal was he had to drink something using it afterwards.
Sam Adams makes it so easy to keep track of the seasons.
This girl is drinking wine and watching grey's anatomy in the library during finals week. I hate comm majors.
on a side note you can NOT make bong water out of a pear
i believe i can now do shots of gasoline with no chaser. its been that kind of summer.
My grandmother cheats at beer pong and has been rubbing her tainted victory in my face for an hour now.
It's like someone is grabbing my scrodum with pliers and just hanging there.
There was a reason God said "Let there be titties" on the Fifth Day.
We had a deepthroating contest with breadsticks at Olive Garden
The problem with that is that my car has been stolen
You are one of my favorite baseball you have fun today
I never thought I could be this turned on by a man wearing racoon tails.
Him showing up yesterday was like a giant ego stroke for my vagina.
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