Going back to college after four years is reminding me why i love cheating... they dont let me cheat on tests but they sure try hard to make me cheat on my girl
I told the cop it was my birthday and he said "happy fuckin birthday", handcuffed me and threw me in the back of the cop car.
Handcuffed. To. Steering. Wheel. Fuck.
At least we kept it together. It's people like him who yell at bushes that give acid a bad name
Housing came buy and confiscated our shopping cart :(
i decided what we are doing for your 21st b-day: camelbacks filled with margaritas
The beers last night were like the tears from god
Is it penis luge time yet?
Blow job bear ended up in my bed last night. She didn't live up to her costume.
I miss you more than I would miss junk food if I went on a diet. And you've seen me eat, you know how desperate I'd be.
i miss freshman lecture halls much harder to take shots in a class of 20
I can only only sleep there on nights I orgasm cause he snores so loud and if he leaves me hanging one more time ill probably cut off his dick from lack of sleep and frustration
But the sex is so much better when he already has a girlfriend
bitch i am allowed to be rude i just fought cold hard porcelain with my face
Yeaaaaa...im super disgusted with myself lol...which is interesting, considering all of the things I have done in my life...
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