yeah that facebook group of people who have had sex with me probably isn't to discreet...
Some fat girl belted her graduation gown. That is not a good look for anyone.
Ok, let's play "if you were a slut" again and try and retrace our steps last night..
A kind stripper put a blanket over me last night
He rode a broom down the stairs while we were mattress surfing. Naked. Buck ass naked. WTF
We were messing around at his place it was going fine until he said, "I'm going to cum, hand me the shot glass"
i told her i wanted to be the Neil Armstrong of her vagina,
so serious though like its almost like I'm playing a game that's my life and Im always losing
While we were having sex he asked me if I wanted to get wingstop after. I think I found my future husband.
But if you move out who will get drunk with me on the roof and yell at boys?!?
How so I keep attracting the virgins? HOW?
You talk about your love for your ninja turtle onesie when you're drunk. Are you really surprised?
Last night we proved the theory that "harder" is the worst rough sex safe-word ever.
Three cheers for handling my crush on my boss in an entirely reasonable manner, by having a threesome with my coworkers.
yes that’s a photo of a horny gay donkey
Oh I know. I’ve known many horny gay donkeys in my time.
That would involve putting on clothes and I don't think I can face that right now.
Randomize
