once he started yelling at me in latin, i wasn't sure what we were fighting about anymore...
i just made my gag reflex go away.
my ex gf has sooo many hot friends... i feel like im at a grocery store when on her fb... just shopping around.
Not really fighting over the same girl. He takes her out to dinner and then I come over and fuck her. We've worked out the perfect relationship.
I wish I could save this moment forever and have sex with it regularly. Its just tht beautiful.
I swear I could audibly hear her vagina slam shut when you walked up to hit on her.
I don't know how I'm boarding the plane tomorrow. I have my car registration.
That bitch ruined vodka saturday
The spark has left our relationship. i used to make slightly inflammatory jokes at you. you would retaliate in jest. look at this. look at what is happening here.
i'm scootering my little heart out so i'm not late for a weed pickup. this is the meaning of adolescence
we passed out in our seats at the game for about 3innings. I guess they showed it on the big screen. nap n rally!
you're no funn. i shall go consult my friend vodka on this matter.
I think I had Hypothermia but was too drunk to notice.
Stop making fun of my hookups!
Stop getting hookups that I can make fun of!
Do you realize our room single-handedly hooked up with most of that wedding party last night?
Randomize
