just took my exes job. there should be an award for how many times I've managed to fuck that girl's life
I don't know what you're doing, but there's a dragon on my street.
He leaned out the window to puke right as the fan for the ac turned on. All of it blew back up into his face.
What's the appropriate I've been inside you but we're not technically dating valentines present?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
how was it?
he was petting the bushes because they were "napkins"
He blended the pizza with water and drank the whole thing. He is my hangover hero
He was just lying on my lap in the backseat screaming how if the cops came he was a blanket.
I just woke up from quarter beer tuesdays wearing 3 pairs of underwear, none of which are the ones I left wearing...2 Around my waist and one around my shoulder in an attempt at a bra. At least drunk me tries to be decent?
he was having a black light party and drinking manischewitz wine out of a three foot tall trophy he stole from mcdonald's...that's when I decided it was time to leave
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Lol he touched my butt after his grad party and a shooting star went by. No kidding. My ass is mystical.
We were mid fuck, and he did a Kermit the Frog impression. Is it weird that I was strangely turned on?
We were sexting and i didn't know what to say, so i said i wanted to wrap him in tortillas and devour him like a burrito. then i went on by saying that i liked my burritos with a lot of cheese.
I've sent two unsolicited tit pictures in less than 24 hours. I'm the female version of a fuckboy.
Invitations to sext will not be acknowledged until 10 a.m. EST. Thank you for your cooperation. We apologize for any inconvenience.
why yes, bad decisions will be made starting at 3PM Thurs through 8PM on Sun. You have been warned. Plan accordingly.
Randomize